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 Post subject: Weird Stories
PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2005 3:11 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun May 29, 2005 5:02 pm
Posts: 3114
Location: Ridderkerk, the Netherlands
Here you can post the weirdest things that happened to you, a friend or relative. It may be really happened, it may be a self thought... I don't care. Jokes are also welcome.

What happened to me last evening:

I was in the local pub, talking to some friends, and suddenly a man came in, with a bloody nose, and a fierce one too! I gave him a handkerchief to stop the bleeding, and I asked:
"How did you get that bloody nose?"
What do you think what he said?
"I had to fight for it!"


The Tempest is an advanced assault vehicle, which carries two heavy Heat-Rays and a Canister Launcher.
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2005 9:50 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:31 pm
Posts: 3365
Location: N.Humberside.UK
Quote:
"I had to fight for it!"

:lol: :lol: I've heard that response before. :lol:


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 09, 2005 7:43 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun May 29, 2005 5:02 pm
Posts: 3114
Location: Ridderkerk, the Netherlands
Where?


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 09, 2005 11:37 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:31 pm
Posts: 3365
Location: N.Humberside.UK
It's an old, old joke. It normaly goes "How did you get that bloody nose?" and the answer is "I had to fight for it" I've got a feeling Spike Milligan used it in his second world war memoirs :-k


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 10, 2005 10:50 am 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun May 29, 2005 5:02 pm
Posts: 3114
Location: Ridderkerk, the Netherlands
Anyway, I was one day in Amsterdam, and there I saw somewhere a man, lying exactly next to the sidewalk on the street! That's really strange huh? So I walked up to the man, and I said: "Hey, What are you doing there, lying on the street?" And then that guy said: "Well, I found a parking place to park the car, now my wife is actually BUYING a car!" #-o


The Tempest is an advanced assault vehicle, which carries two heavy Heat-Rays and a Canister Launcher.
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 10, 2005 10:25 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:31 pm
Posts: 3365
Location: N.Humberside.UK
:lol: :lol:


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 11, 2005 9:16 am 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun May 29, 2005 5:02 pm
Posts: 3114
Location: Ridderkerk, the Netherlands
And later I went to the butcher's to buy a rumpsteak, but it was tough! It was so tough I could use it as a shoesole! But I haven't done that. I tried to though, but I couldn't get the nails through it! ](*,)


The Tempest is an advanced assault vehicle, which carries two heavy Heat-Rays and a Canister Launcher.
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:19 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun Feb 13, 2005 10:00 pm
Posts: 2870
Location: Liverpool, UK
#-o


Bah bah black sheap April diamond spheres, Rigsby, Rigsby, Eight sided Pears.


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 11, 2005 9:01 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:31 pm
Posts: 3365
Location: N.Humberside.UK
:shock: Oh' That is an old one. Bernard Cornwell ofter uses that one in his 'Richard Sharpe's' books. and they are set between 1799-1820. and I don't think it was original then :wink:


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2005 10:09 am 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun May 29, 2005 5:02 pm
Posts: 3114
Location: Ridderkerk, the Netherlands
Here's a joke: It's green, and it doesn't weigh a thing!


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2005 11:13 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:31 pm
Posts: 3365
Location: N.Humberside.UK
:-k :-s [-o< :-s :-k I give up, what is it?


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 13, 2005 10:00 am 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun May 29, 2005 5:02 pm
Posts: 3114
Location: Ridderkerk, the Netherlands
The answer is: LIGHT GREEN! :a037: :mrgreen:


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 13, 2005 10:08 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:31 pm
Posts: 3365
Location: N.Humberside.UK
:roll: Oh' God I should of seen that one coming :lol:

OK, Whats Black and White and red all over?


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 14, 2005 8:09 am 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun May 29, 2005 5:02 pm
Posts: 3114
Location: Ridderkerk, the Netherlands
I don't know :-k A trash can covered in blood? :-s


The Tempest is an advanced assault vehicle, which carries two heavy Heat-Rays and a Canister Launcher.
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 14, 2005 12:35 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun Feb 13, 2005 10:00 pm
Posts: 2870
Location: Liverpool, UK
May I Lonesome?

A newspaper!

Tee Hee.


Bah bah black sheap April diamond spheres, Rigsby, Rigsby, Eight sided Pears.


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 14, 2005 3:52 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun May 29, 2005 5:02 pm
Posts: 3114
Location: Ridderkerk, the Netherlands
:lol: That was a good one! A friend of mine has some troubles though. He told me that his brother thinks he's a dog! He's been like it since he was a puppy.


The Tempest is an advanced assault vehicle, which carries two heavy Heat-Rays and a Canister Launcher.
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 14, 2005 10:29 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:31 pm
Posts: 3365
Location: N.Humberside.UK
Loz wrote:
May I Lonesome?

A newspaper!

Tee Hee.

Good try 'Loz' but that would be "read all over" It doesn't work in the written form.

The answer is 'A Sunburnt Zebra' :o


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 14, 2005 10:36 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:31 pm
Posts: 3365
Location: N.Humberside.UK
[concerned Brother] Doctor, doctor my sister thinks she's a chicken.

[Doctor] Would you like me to cure her?

[concerned Brother] Oh' no Doctor, we need the eggs.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 15, 2005 9:12 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun May 29, 2005 5:02 pm
Posts: 3114
Location: Ridderkerk, the Netherlands
The father of my friend used to work by the Navy, to be precise, he was in the submarines, but he has been fired directly yesterday. Wanna know what he did?


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 16, 2005 5:51 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:31 pm
Posts: 3365
Location: N.Humberside.UK
Of course :D sorry that should be 'why what did he do' :a103:


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 16, 2005 6:15 pm 
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Martian War Lord

Joined: Sun May 29, 2005 5:02 pm
Posts: 3114
Location: Ridderkerk, the Netherlands
He was fired, because he slept with the window open!

(And you know what can cause it to a submarine :| )


The Tempest is an advanced assault vehicle, which carries two heavy Heat-Rays and a Canister Launcher.
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